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An Act of Worship

by Kate Thompson

A vegetarian falls for a butcher - not a marriage made in heaven! Too much eco-preachiness for my liking, but short sentences and lots of dialogue make for an easy read.

Extract

'Do you know what I'd do to them?' she said.
'To who?' said Mairead.
'To your man, the bull-murderer. And the rest of them as well. This evil lot.' She swept her arm around, indicating the loose gathering at the bar.
'I'd have them standing knee-deep in mud for half the year and sleeping in their own shit for the other half. I'd castrate ninety per cent of the males and coop up the rest in an artificial insemination station ... I'd bring some luscious young floosie in and tease them till their eyes were popping out and then - I'd tie up their wives while men in white suits stuck syringes up them. And exactly nine months later I'd winch their babies out with calving-jacks.'

The farmers were sniggering. The barmaid was blushing. One of the tourists was staring, wide-eyed. The other was busy with a pocket dictionary.

Parallels

Behind the Scenes at the Museum by Kate Atkinson
Death in the Afternoon by Ernest Hemingway
 

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